an ASS out of U and ME

‎"The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him... Death and life are in the power of the tongue.." (Prov 18:17-21)

Ppl hear stuff from close friends or ppl they trust in their life, and they make assumptions as to truth and character.. often times forgetting that there is another side to everything, and while what they assume is sometimes correct, it is very often not.. 

This verse says that someone tells their side whether in their pain or their jealousy or their excitement.. but when the other person involved is given the opportunity to share their side and the "why" of what happened.. the truth can take a very about-face turn. Even ppl we love and trust and respect can get it wrong.. sometimes for selfish motives, sometimes lying to themselves as much as everyone else, sometimes meaning well... but still wrong.

My challenge for the coming year is for ppl to go to ppl and seek out the truth, to seek God for right discernment, and then the wisdom and strength to deal with everyone involved with justice and with love.. not just for their besties.. but for the whole of their circle of family, friends, and community. Keeping in mind that sometimes community involves ppl we don't like... and that doing justly when we are dealing with our enemies, sharpens our character and brings good things back around to those we love.

Love your enemies.. Godly love is disciplining those we love.. do what's right.. not in arrogance or abrasiveness.. but with gentleness, self-control, and humility.

Talk to ppl...

And stop making an ASS out of U and ME ♥

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Some ppl don't tell their side.. for lots of reasons.. too painful, too exhausted, not given opportunity, to protect other ppl involved, whatever... and truth becomes a lie, gossip, a power play, or just plain meanness... words carry alot of weight... as does silence.. don't judge ppl, until you talk to them about whatever it is that is tempting you to judge them.

Considering not just the side of those you like.. but both sides.

Tick Story

I think someone stole my tick story... lol. About ten years ago, I was one of the bloggers on a very popular Christian Website.. one of the topics of discussion in the Marriage and Family section was asking for stories of young children walking in on mom and dad at inopportune moments.. 

I shared a story of such an incident when one of my kids was about three. One night several years back as young parents, we looked up in our dimly lit room, and noticed a little someone standing there. In utter panic as we tried to remain cool and calm.. my husband was asked, "What are you doing?"

Our kiddo had an aversion to ticks, so without missing a beat my husband responded, "I'm checking mom for ticks." Which was met with a cringe coupled with great approval, as they turned and went back to bed. And the incident was never mentioned again. The story got a great number of hits on the blog, and comments from ppl who found it brilliant, lol.

Recently, someone released a country song titled, "I'd like to check you for Ticks." A long shot I'm sure, but I think it's kinda funny to imagine that I helped to inspire the writers of that song, hahaha =)

Raising Adult Children

Thoughts with a Friend about Raising Adult Children...

~ There's alot to be said for anonymity when picking ppl's brains for advice 

~ Altho, you are much like me and we tend to think out loud a little more than ppl are comfortable with.. hence our solid friendship.. and our rejection by certain others who gloss over truth in sensitive matters to the detriment of everyone involved. Truth finds it's way out.. when ppl bury it, it always finds it's way out. Sometimes it emerges in unpleasant ways, but often times when it comes to the surface it sets the stage to clean some things up and restore healty relationships.

~ Ppl have to choose whether to blow up and selfishly stomp away.. or open their eyes that other ppl have feelings too and not everyone is wired to live in denial.. ignoring the elephant in the room so everyone can choose their poison (the tensions that make them comfortable and to hell with everyone elses feelings).

~ But sometimes as parents.. quite often.. we have to truly measure the line of what we can stomach from our adult children... and that involves letting them go find the life they are looking for in their own home outside of the one they grew up in.. they gotta fly, no matter how messy and risky they choose to do it.. rips ur heart out as a parent.. but it's just life.

~ the main thing is to make sure that they understand that you love them and the door to your home is always open for them and anyone they are married to, who can enter it and be respectful.

~ They don't have to agree with you on everything.. but they can come over for a couple hours and keep the peace long enough for our children and grandchildren to love on family for a bit.. if that's too hard then, then I question their definition of love and family...

~ love is able to sacrifice a couple hours of the spotlight in someone's life, so they can nurture family relationships.. if you love someone, you can hold your tongue and talk about the weather for a while and then go on your merry way when you walk out that door.

~ When ppl live very different lives... it requires a good deal of commitment to come together and resolve to enjoy a few hours of peace and fun together. Don't discuss touchy issues, chances are everyone knows how everyone feels already.. keep the conversation on positive memories and current humor.. when someone challenges the peace.. just don't touch it... don't pick it up.. resist the obvious temptation to have the last word.. take control of the moment and change the subject.. be the guide.. seek the Spirit of God to lead you thru that minefield... it sux.. but it's the life of parents with adult kids 

~ But when there is blatant disrespect or an aggressive challenge to disrupt the peace demanding your approval of things you cannot approve of with a clear conscience before God.. you might need to be ready to ask them to leave. Always politely, yet with a sternness so they know you are serious. And you need to stick to it. Let them go home.. let them sulk and blame you and everyone that disagrees with them. It's sooo painful, but sometimes you need to give them that time to themselves to make some decisions as to what they are willing to live with, how much of their relationship with their parents are they willing to give up... and what is it that is so great that it would ask them to disrespect the ppl that love them dearly and who they will love and need always (even tho they think they can live without them, they would be wrong). Kids and parents will always need some connection/relationship.. it changes year by year, it looks and smells and tastes differently as we all change and grow older... but children will only ever have one mother and one father, and parents will only ever have the children God blessed their heart with.

~ I know how much you love your daughter.. and your wife and family.. no one gets the perfect life.. we've all gotta decide what we truly do not want to lose, and what we are willing to live with to hold onto it.. and we have to give other ppl room to do the same.. and then trust God to keep up with the shattered pieces of broken dreams. He has a way of bringing them back together in ways we never imagined. Sometimes it's not the dream we wanted or envisioned, but when we try to glimpse God in it and his plans and purpose to bless us and our children, he causes us to gain a new love for something that seemed so foreign in the beginning. Love to you, and your family. This is tough stuff to walk through, there are no easy answers or even final resolutions... it's often a day by day thing, and can be exhausting, but I am trusting God to keep you and your loved ones in his perfect will. Hugs Mister =)

Super Powers in the Making

So many friends have been down with the flu.. bleh, love and hugs and prayers for a speedy recovery <3

Made me think of when my kids were little and got sick. I would tell them about how our bodies form specific antibodies to fight off such things and that once we fight a certain sickness, our blood is changed and we gain a super power of sorts that will fight off that sickness every time it tries to attack us again. It helped them to understand that God truly brings good things from every negative thing we must face in life. 

Just the other day, sis was sick, and made the comment that she wished her body would hurry up with the antibodies so this crud would hurry up and pass, lol. It was an important lesson in understanding that sometimes God says wait when he answers our prayers because he is doing something that will affect our future for a greater good, an equipping, a change within us physically or spiritually or emotionally. 

It sux being sick!
But thank God that he is at work, fighting for us, and changing us to be stronger as we find our feet again and continue forward <3

Zodiac Signs

Talking astrology with a friend.. 

~ don't like horoscopes cuz I feel like they are a spiritual force that tries to control and manipulate.. but basic signage stuff seems more like personality traits to me.. idk why it's so accurate but ppl really do reflect their signs, christian or not. Thing to remember is that God can change any habit or personality trait in anyone, and has all authority over such things. So don't ever feel like a sign locks you or someone else into being a certain way. Even tho some of it is accurate much of it is gray. I consider signs sometimes, never horoscopes, but I always ask God about it all.

~ Christians use something called Simple, Scorner, Fool to determine personality traits. (As well as Treasure Tree Traits of Otter, Lab, Beaver, and Lion).

~ one other thing is that astro signs tend to take away a persons individuality and how special and unique they are. Like if someone breaks up with you, they may hook up with another Leo or Cancer or whatever you are, thinking you are replaceable based on character traits. But they would be wrong. There is only one AMAZON WOMAN that we all know and love. There is a side of this stuff that holds some truth, tho slightly, but there is a side that can become easily twisted and is very negative. I am glad you are just keeping it silliness and fun.. no other Leo will ever replace your beautiful face!

~ Think of it like colors.. you might be blue. And that would mean that you can be cool and jazzie and one of my very favorite colors ever. But you would be so much more than just a blob on the color wheel boxed in between green and purple. God or Life or your own stubborn self might just add a little yellow to who you are so you can move a little closer to yellow and see what that would be like. You could add any color you choose from the wheel to move freely throughout the spectrum... tho still not losing the core of who you are. Just be sure that you don't let such things limit you and define you..

~ oh, and don't let it color how you view other ppl in your life. No one wants to be boxed in, judged, or limited by a label.

~ Here's another random thought for those who like to explore the rabbit holes of life a little deeper.. and because I am an Aquarius and tend to get lost in random thought... but what if it's not about the dates at all, but more about the season you are born in. Maybe it's the social temperament/environment you are born into that affects and shapes aspects of your personality. Like the fun loving, life of the party Sagittarius born during Christmas, the peak of fesitive holidays and celebration. Or the Leo born during the height of the summer, strutting her stuff on the beach and turning heads. Or the Aquarius, born during the height of the winter when everyone is aloof and out of touch as they buckle under ice and freezing temps. This whole thing of astrology could just be motivated by the social climate we are born into, that shapes our psyche as to why we were born and how we measure it to what's happening in our lives every year when we celebrate our birth and meditate on that thought. It would be interesting to compare the personality traits and signs of ppl who live on the opposite side of the world or who celebrate a very different cycle of holidays/cultures...

~ Keeping in mind that even if that is the case.. and it is the season we are born into that is one of many factors that contribute to how our personality is wired.. we must remember that it is God who determines when we are born, into what season, and the intricate talents and giftings that he equips us with to accomplish all purpose for which we were fashioned. As well as where he sends us into this world, which side of the planet, what family, what community.. he fashions every fiber of our being and then places us in this life with absolute precision to succeed in our calling.. just as intimately as he placed his own son in a tiny box of straw in a manger ♥

~ He really does fight for us, gives us every advantage, favors us beyond our flaws.. the rest is up to us.

suhs-pihhhh-shuss

I'm suspicious of most everything that appears picture perfect.. cuz that's just not the reality of life in this world.. it wasn't when Jesus walked the earth, and it isn't real even in the most holy looking churches and holy sounding ppl. I wanna see the bandaids, and the scars, and the ugly that has dried up and died like a scab. That's what's real. That's someone whose been in the battle and won ♥
... anything else is plastic and mirrors and masks.

Filthy Rags

~ The biggest stumbling block of effectively living out holiness is the offense we entertain at those who we consider less holy than ourselves.

~ That was the whole point of I Cor 13... defining love not as religion does or after the traditions of men, rather defining love as Christ demonstrated it and continues to demonstrate it. Not separating yourself from ppl, but separating yourself from their sin. Not seeing their lack of faith in the Christian God as something that makes them less than you, but seeing a hurting soul that you wanna share the goodness and blessings of God with. 

So often we boast within our own hearts to ourselves about our own holiness and how far we have come and our testimony of all that God has done for us and fashioned us to become... and our prosperity blinds us from seeing just how filthy our righteousness remains in Truth.

The only thing that separates us from that person that we consider less holy than ourselves is the KNOWLEDGE of the love of Christ.

We have heard and believed, and they have either not heard or not been convinced to believe it yet. It is not about how clean and groomed we can get our lives, nothing we do or say matters if we do not LOVE AS GOD LOVES... seeing others eye to eye, on our level, playing on the same field, just trying to understand how to win this game.

The knowledge that winning only comes through Christ as coach, captain, and quarterback is our holiness, and all the rest is trimming. God says to seek to be holy, to seek to be perfect, and yet he says that none is perfect save (except) ONE.. and that is Jesus Christ. We all fall short, it is only by grace.

Not to judge one another, but to check ourselves.

What attitude is truly permeating our heart when we encounter, minister to and even serve those who are without Christ, ruled by the world, offensive and full of hate toward us and our God... until we see ourselves in their pain and ugliness, we fail. They are us, and we are them, save for the knowledge of the love of Jesus for us all. And our ideas of our own holiness are only gonna hinder them from ever seeing who Christ truly is.

We all too often demand that ppl be like us, rather than encourage them to be like Christ. We can change that, we can get it right. Praying that God gives us revelation of his definition of love ♥

The Gradual Drift

~ You can be holy all day long.. but until you get desperate.. you will never truly know how gritty and real and in your face Jesus is... 

Get Your Hands Dirty, Get Messy, He did.

~ That's not a license to sin... that's a challenge to stop holding life at arms length while holding your nose as tho you are above it... life happens, now get in there and live it, get some paper towels and clean up the vomit, yours and everyone God guides your steps to encounter. Serving involves the yucky stuff more so than the spotlight. And holiness is not about a clean reputation...

God said they would talk trash about you just like they did him.
So get over it.

~ "What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? ...We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was ...we too might walk in newness of life." (Romans 6)

~ "See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ ...who is the head of all rule and authority. ...And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him.

Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ. Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind..."
(2 Colossians 2)

Not all that calls itself Christian is...
And not all who claim you are to obey your church leaders, are right...
Jesus first and all that he said and taught..
Family...
Then the Church.

Anything that is contrary to all that Jesus said and did and taught, is a fraud and not even on the list of Godly authority, trumped and a doctrine/tradition of devils. Ppl have relied on others to tell them what God says for so long, that they never read their Bibles and Ask God for themselves about how to walk this thing out.

The gradual drift has moved us so far from the mark.
Time to get out the compass and consult the captain and get this thing back on course ♥

~ 

Had a vision years ago of a heard of sheep, confused and dazed and meandering... the shepherd called and one by one the sheep looked up, each one hearing and rushing to follow the shepherds lead.. as they heard and responded to the shepherd one by one, personally, not biting and following those around them... they became a flock, moving as one, unified and heading in the right direction.. the meadow, food, drink, content, a force.

The church will never be a flock until we begin to hear and obey and move as the shepherd calls us.. we must hear one by one, in order to become one.

LIFE: a sword through your heart

"God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin's name was Mary. The angel went to her and said, "Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you."
(Luke 1:26-28)

Heard this story a million times in light of all the understandable warm fuzzies it stirs up for the Christmas Celebration.. but something occurred to me that I found quite wonderful this morning.

God sent a message to Mary, a greeting, to assure her of her calling and to encourage her heart in what she was about to face. He revealed himself to her as Emmanuel, GOD WITH US. That is what Christ coming to earth was about. He became one of us, to walk this hell on earth out beside us, to lead us along in finding our way out of the darkness.. the road that man detoured onto that was never God's plan or will.. 

God speaks the same encouragement to us today. He sent a message by his Word and he speaks through his Spirit as well, wanting us to always remember that HE IS WITH US... assuring us of our calling as part of his family, with purpose and an important, significant existence, that man will never value as God does... encouraging us to hold on despite the hell we are about to face, the hatred, rejection, and sense of loneliness as we continue forward against the grain of this world, ppl we know, ppl we don't, ppl who appreciate what we give, but who will never appreciate us as followers of Christ... encouraging us to love despite it all just like the example he set.

Mary's role of birthing and raising Christ was a "sword through her heart".. she was a pregnant engaged woman which was such a stigma at the time that she would have been stoned. She was made to flee, faced the uncertainty and accusations of others around her that knew the numbers didn't add up for her due date and wedding... she faced shame, loneliness, fear.. all those things we feel that are foreign to God and to the two dimensional ppl we read about in the Bible. But it was all real, as real as whatever your situation is that is causing you to understand those exact same feelings of emptiness and loneliness and depression...

The difference is that Mary believed God's message. Scripture says she wondered and was unsure of much of what happened as it happened, but she PONDERED IT IN HER HEART. That means she put it on the the back burner and waited for God to bring understanding in his timing.. trusted God no matter how much sense and sadness and threat of death surrounded her and her baby and her family. It was a scary walk that she was asked to walk, and yet, she walked it all the way to the grave. And so must we. She cried, she was tempted to doubt, she questioned, and hurt and pleaded with God for understanding and help... but each time, she resolved to trust him, and to continue in her calling as best she could. 

God sent us a message, a greeting, today in this moment...
"Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you."

Life is a warzone thru the darkness.. but you are favored, covered with grace no matter how messy you walk it, the favorite in his eyes, the one he walks beside carrying a big stick, a cross, a ship that will get you to the other side and out of this dark place. There are many reasons to be afraid.. he gets that, he was tempted to fear as well, he was fully man as much as fully God.. that's why he constantly reminds us.. DO NOT BE AFRAID... that's not a rebuke, it's direction to check yourself and to choose courage, to remember that you are not alone even tho it feels like you are. 

THE LORD IS WITH YOU.

remember that this Christmas season and thru the coming year. Write it down somewhere and ponder it in your heart when life gets ugly and makes no sense. 

Hugs to You <3

Do you?...

[Jesus said,] "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?" (John 11:25)

believing.. that's the key.
Do you believe him?
not based on all the things that you feel are unsure and unreliable, but based on the person of Jesus as God and Spirit and Supernatural. Talk to him out loud about it. See what he says in action and deed. Then decide if you...

believe ♥

A Fraction of a Cent

"Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, I am the gate for the sheep; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it in full." 
(John 10:7 and 9-10)

This life is only a blink of our full lives... a fraction of a cent of all the treasure that God has planned for us... we can choose to die for eternity in poverty with that fraction being our eternal legacy.. or we can choose to live forever rich in good things, precious relationships, and the love of God.

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No matter how much we acquire in this life, money, popularity, power, success... it spends like a fraction of a cent in eternity.

Into The Darkness

"When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said,"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12)

This is so great.. cuz that light is within you when you invite Christ to rule and reign over you.. it is warm and intimate and filling. Ppl can blind you or throw you in a hole, but you will not be lost in the darkness cuz he knows exactly where you are.. and he fights for you. He knows where you are at all times, who you are, your deepest pain and greatest joy.. cuz he is that light that remains in the core of your being.. walking this hell out beside you and telling hell "only this far.. and only for the good of my child and every life she touches."

Life is good.. God is real.. Walk in Faith, in Hope, and in Love...
Even when you must walk into the Darkness ♥

You're Gonna Be Okay

Especially as someone called by his name, a Christian...

Life is seldom what you hoped for or expected.. cuz it involves ppl and ppl are complicated and messy.. yeah the yuck trips us up and leaves us with wounds and scars no one on this earth will ever understand or be able to fully relate to.. we walk with a limp, so far from perfect, but always seeking to be better ppl and making changes daily, ever so slightly, but always with a made-up mind to move forward... let Christ walk it out beside you, hear him, consider his advice and words, receive his mercy and know that you're gonna be okay.. life has a way of working out.. when we trust him to lead us along in what is right.

You are loved, hang in there and just breathe ♥

So Blatantly Obvious

~ "I don't want to talk about you
like you're not in the room.
Wanna look right at you,
Wanna sing right to you..."

~ I will never fit any where in this world, not even in religious circles. But Jesus will forever fit nicely into my heart and rule and reign over it. He knows my story, he brought me through it and helped me write it, and I will forever seek to live it out to the end as he dictates and no one else.

~ Everyone keeps talking about this great end time revival like we can orchestrate the thing that will satisfy the hunger that is raging in the hearts of so many today.. ppl keep looking for a program or a technique or a Barna statistic to bring revelation.. but I just think God has something so much greater in mind.. something beyond the polished, neat and clean chess board we tend to set on the table as well meaning ppl of faith.. 

what if God?...

what if he doesn't plan on doing something eccentric and earth-shaking?

what if he does something so very simple and common and blatantly obvious that we totally missed it, looked right past it, thought it small and insignificant and not enough and too messy?...

wouldn't that be just like God?

to shake the world and rattle all things into alignment by simply gently speaking truth on a typical day in the life...
♥

Early Morning Wake Up Calls

So I talked to God at bedtime last night... praying a special prayer of protection for two of my kiddos and their friends attending a house show last night... was a great show I hear... but the phone still rang at 5am, which is never a good thing.

My other son was broke down in a nearby city after working all night til 3:00am... and needed to be 50 miles from there to work a second 8 hr shift... so we hit the road to check his car and give him a lift... then one of his friends is picking him up when he is off cuz he is gonna have to have his car towed... craziness. But everyone is safe and sound, tho there is still some stress to deal with... I have much to be thankful for, the grace of God is felt so strongly in my life these days... I am blessed ♥

"...He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart. He gently leads those that have children..." (Isaiah 40:11) He gave me this passage when I became a mom to comfort me for having lost my mom as a child. It leaves such a void in a woman's life that few can relate to, but God has filled it with such tenderness and mercy. He taught me and empowered me to be the mother I never had.

God answers prayer... and he keeps his promises... making a way thru difficult times when there seems to be no way. God loves you and is with you too, Trust in him ♥